Stress

Alot of stress, fear and frustrations have been inputed into my life these couple of days. My CCA's now dont even make a hell sense, im flopping my common test results, the letter to my damn principal to return sports day, my damn friends who try to put me down, the damn Homework that keeps piling up, no matter how much I complete them, a damn motivational camp that doesn't even make sense, etc.

When these much stuff get onto my mind... well it depends on my physical health. If I'm still fine and healthy, I would just keep my mouth shut and go through all of it. But recently last night I didn't take a break, and worked the whole night through on 3 pieces of work, the type and print of the letter to my damn principal, and was still not feeling well. Today I experienced what I have not felt in a long time, I eventually had chest tightness, and from that with not enough oxygen flowing through my brain, I got a seizure. I managed to fight it, but can have 4 outcomes. The most occasional , anger burst. I would literally curse anything and everything that I saw , with physical blowd to deal with anyone to stands in my way. Most common outcome, I would curl up into a ball, pull my hair and rock back and forth, occasionally losing my mind and havr no control over my actions. The other 2, I will laugh out loud in a maniac tone and they pass out on the floor few seconds later.
Well the hair pulling was what took place today, with all pent up anger, stesss and confusion , I couldn't think and breathe straight.... Just completed CCA and now on the way to POA class. What do you guys do go manage your stress?  Mine obviously is one of the worst ways. Hahah

But there is one quote I live by 'Sometimes I feel like giving up, but then I remember all the motherf****** I have to prove wrong'. This really is the thing I wake our of bed for . Whats yours?

Nights

Midnight now hanging out with 3 guys and gal. You know, going out late at night wif your friends enjoying the breeze and peace of the night, is really relaxing. Your friends also play a vital role as well, they help liven up the atmosphere :)

Lying down in the middle of the playground on a trampoline looking up high into the skies, I rmb all the times I had with her. Maybe it is true, I still care and worry about her. Even if my heart tells me not to love her anymore,  it still tells me that I have to care. Heh messed up feelings

True that I have an eyecandy, but so far it only remained as that. Nothing more or less. For valentines day... yeah sure y not I'll spend it with the people I love the most. The guys. Maybe get a couple gifs for other girls whom I'm close to? Hah sure :)

Exams coming up, and as soon as I wake up tomorrow I have to study. Me and Jishnu have an agreement.  We'll work together as weapon engineers. So far, it has somehow been in my interest. Sure maybe I'll change in the future, but now I'll stick as a weapon engineer.

Walking home late at night let me see alot of couples together.  Meh I feel....empty?  I hope it will be gone soon. My friends noe are all I need. I love them lots.

Next Saturday going for steamboat with camp buddies, and I'm really excited for it.
I just realised,  that starting this year, I amends with a lot of new friends. I'm closer to alot of people,  Daniel, the 2 megans, Larry, Joel ,etc.  This year is getting better :)

I will be personally stronger in all my aspects, and become a better guy. Learn new stuff, work harder for the better. :) Thanks Daniel :)

Haha, I have no idea what else to talk about :) Been too long since I blogged. I like to read my friend's blogs but kinda lazy to update.